Beach full of fun in so many ways


Life can be a real beach sometimes. You know, the brilliant sun, the powdery white soft sand, gentle surf and just enough breeze to keep you comfortable.

Now that’s a real beach right?


That’s a Hallmark Movie beach. On my beach in 20 minutes, the sun will cook you like an overdone lobster.

The powdery white soft sand is such a pleasure to walk on but, if I’m only walking on it, you know like the bottom of my feet are the only thing touching the sand, how do they defy gravity to travel up 4 feet into the netting of my swimsuit?

There’s always a bunch there. Take off your sandals when you get home and what spills all over the floor? Sand. What’s on the seats of your car the next day? Sand. Under your fingernails? Sand.

What, do they multiply like love bugs once you take them away from their natural environment? I’m telling you something is wrong here. If I have that much sand attached to everything I encountered that day, and there’s a thousand other people doing the same thing, there shouldn’t be any left on the beach.

The gentle surf is another story. Recently, while on St. Pete Beach with some friends in the always calm Gulf of Mexico, I witnessed the most hilarious sequence of events.

Our friend was trying to help my wife deal with unexpectedly strong waves that day. The first scene was my wife trying to get her balance and boom a wave hits and she is dunked. So, our friend went to help hold her up and another wave hits them both and boom. Now, they’re both underwater and come up laughing hysterically.

But they weren’t done.

Our friend decided to teach my wife how to deal with the wave attack. She told her to jump over the low waves and dive into the high waves.

Simple enough.

Next wave came. It was a high one. She jumps and boom. Submerged again.

The friend says, “No. Dive into the big ones and jump over the small ones.”

Next wave was small. She dives into it. Oh brother. Underwater again when she didn’t have to be.

Yeah, I think the best wave at the beach is the one done with my right hand while sitting on the shore chilling with a cold beer.

You know, sometimes life can be a real beach.